The Past

MOVING FORWARD By taking heed of past deeds 

AND IT KEEPS COMIMG BACK. What is it about the past that haunts us every time we’re confronted with it? We came out alright, are we? If we’re somehow damaged out of that problematic episode a year ago, at least we were able to get some lesson from it. So if you look at it from that angle, it’s always a win-win situation, despite having that profound effect on you. 

For my part, I don’t want to go back in there. That is a territory that makes me uncomfortable at times, especially when I think of those reprehensible moments that made my mother cry. It’s a time and place that I don’t want to relive if that is indeed possible. I had a rough one. In fact, I’m not even proud of some of the things I did then. I’d rather forget about it and move on. 

But as that saying goes, those who do not take heed of their past deeds are bound to repeat it. You still, however, need to consider some of the setbacks you’ve gone through just for the sake of having that perspective. While it is true that we should all forget about that sad thing in the past, be it a relationship breakup or a death in the family, we should take heed of it still, and treat it with some introspection.

It would be fatalistic to face life without looking back at your baggage 21 years ago or even yesterday. For one, that’s not something you would call calculated, you’re simply living off your life like most people. And two, how can you possible you’re your future if you don’t give a hoot about what’s in store for you today? Only when you take stock of what you have right now that ultimately determines your life tomorrow. 

Though I’m a bit critical about what happened in the past, my curiosity as to its inception, to its effect even, like the transformation of a particular person, tells more about what they have gone through in the past than what they are responding to in the present.     

The past is a sorry sphere to dwell into. If you have a traumatic one, chances are, you’re not really receptive to its caresses even if it gently touches you. You tend to evade certain questions pertaining to it, or you may even go mad at a mere mention of the word. You may have stashed your past in a closet on various occasions, hiding it from everybody, out of fear or shame or hate, but sooner or later it will come out, and it would be too late for you to contain its spillage.

Your past will haunt you still no matter how many times you brush it off. It affects you more than the weather. Otherwise, I don’t see that it infringes your present or your tomorrow or the day after, it may serve as a motivation even for you to act, knowing that you can do something about that sorry thing you’ve done some years ago.